Can self-expression replace worship?

Self-image has never been more important than it is today. There was a time when humans never even had mirrors. I wonder if we were never intended to look at ourselves so much.

The case could easily be made that the more attention we put on ourselves the less secure we’ve become. Perhaps this is why we were meant to mirror One greater than us rather than trip over our own naval-gazing. 

This idea of pointing to God’s holiness rather than ours has never been attractive to humanity. Since the Fall, our hearts burn to be our own gods. The more we try to be, the less we see others as people to love but rather distractions to our purpose or threats to our ego. Our self-image then becomes something we must protect rather than reflect. 

As our circles become smaller, so does our world. The problem we’re left with is that we’ve defended ourselves to the point of isolation. This is not only devastating to those outside the church, but to ourselves as well. Here are three repercussions which come to mind:

1. We lose security 

Now that our identity is in something we do rather than in the One we worship, we must keep up with the pace we’ve created. Our image must be maintained. It appears noble from the outside, as we ambitiously focus on spiritual disciplines. But inside, the only fulfillment we receive is either from our own applause or that from others. 

When it stops, we deflate. Now we must hurry and do more spiritual things to be worthy of the love we think we deserve.

At best, when we’re on a spiritual high we are in constant anxiety of losing it. At worst, we are constantly feeling inept. Either way, our insecurity steadily increases. 

2. We avoid confrontation

Our obsession for holiness has pulled us inward instead of pointing to Christ. But it’s our own self-expressed holiness not His. To save our self-esteem we’ve swelled our ego. Healthy criticism is now seen as a threat to our identity.

We can no longer view our flaws accurately because we’ve made sure to surround ourselves with people who never challenge us. Worse, we may view counsel as spiritual warfare because it puts our perfect image in jeopardy.

Not only does our self-expression overshadow our ability to be exhorted but we lose sight of others in the process. 

3. We resist community

So long as those around us give us what we feel we need, they are welcome. We may minister to someone in order to feel charitable. If we mentor or teach someone in the church, we’re excited to showcase our scholarly proficiency. But if we don’t feel any benefit for ourselves, we may see people as a distraction to our “greater purpose.” Or, if we feel someone else is besting our efforts, we feel intimidated. 

Community becomes pawns for our ego rather than people to love. We stop seeing them as God does. He sees us as unique body parts that make up the church, working in unity. With our self-glorifying worship, we don’t see the individuality of the church. We only see ourselves. 

We love others as much as we feel loved by God. And if we believe we must earn it, others must earn our love too. 

This leaves the church more secluded than ever in an already isolated society starved for community. 

Have we forgotten the point of it all? The reason we pursue spiritual formation is so that we might live out the gospel to those around us, not withdraw ourselves in our prayer room. As God’s Triune traits teach us, His love naturally moves outwards, extending towards others.

If our worship leads us inward, we’re worshipping something else. Maybe even ourselves. But a love which comes from God bears the image of Him and therefore is free of the weight of perfection. A love which comes from God is free to love others because it doesn’t see people as competition but complementary. 

The purpose of the gospel isn’t to revel in its beauty in solitude, but exude it through the way we live and interact with others. 

When we are assured that the source of our life is secure in Christ, there’s a mysterious joy to be found. We catch glimpses of this joy as our hearts swim deeper in the knowledge of who God is. Our needs turn to wants and our joys we now see as His gifts to us. We need nothing from anyone, only excess love to extend to others.

It’s far easier to think about others if we’re completely satisfied with Christ. We see the early church model this beautifully. The disciples gave a beautiful example of what a loving community was like for them. 

 “They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. Everyone was filled with awe at the many wonders and signs performed by the apostles. All the believers were together and had everything in common. They sold property and possessions to give to anyone who had need. Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved.” (Acts 2:42-47)

They shared their belongings with others as if what they owned wasn’t theirs. They gave freely of themselves because all of their needs were met.

As we become more like Him our hearts align with His, slowly softening over time. We love what He loves, we hope for what He hopes for, we grieve what grieves Him. We must allow for the Holy Spirit to do His work in our hearts to do so.

If we live like we don’t need Him, we don’t allow His transformative love to change us. And He never forces His love on us. 

There’s a confidence we have in God when we are His beloved child. When our identity is established by His righteousness and not our own, we can rest down our shoulders.

No need to prove our worth, He’s already called us His. No need to work for our salvation, He sees Jesus’ perfection not our own.